My Cancer Journey 7 – Voiceless


In November 2022 we were beginning to socialise again after a long period of lockdown. We were happy to be invited out to see some dear friends with a young family.

We had a lovely time, but unfortunately I caught some viral infection from one of the young ones! Quite often a virus will linger on with secondary infections in my throat and sinuses. This indeed occurred and I was somewhat dismayed to find that I completely lost my voice.

This continued for a full month!

You really do take for granted the ability to speak. You rely on it to socialise and express yourself.

Fortunately Adrian and our children were quite good at understanding me. I tried to accentuate mouthing of words in addition to being able to make some sounds with my breath, tongue and lips which served to provide a hint of the given vowel or consonant.

I also used gestures which were my own made up form of sign language.

I have been involved in a lot of children’s work in church over the years, and I always enjoyed making up actions to worship songs. That came in handy as I was able to draw on that in order to participate in the worship in church.

I have been quite musical and enjoyed singing and leading worship over the years and so it is a loss not to be able to sing. But having a sense of musicality, you can’t help but feel the music and be able to embrace it in a different way.

One day we met with our kid’s and their other halves to see The Prince of Egypt musical in London. During the evening I did find a bit of a voice by raising the pitch from my normal voice.

Soon after that I was seen in the voice clinic at Worthing ENT. After having my neck examined and the nasoscope inserted, I was instructed to attempt to make certain sounds, including singing Happy Birthday.

I’m not sure what happened, but I left clinic very happy and able to speak again, albeit in the higher pitch!


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